I Wrote Your Name
by Lieutenant Tazer
Summary: When they started dating, Tony could remember every lecture about how everyone would kick his ass if he ever hurt Steve. Not once did they warn Steve about the fragile heart of Tony Stark as no one expected Steve to cheat on Tony. Slash! StevexTony
1. Chapter 1

I Wrote Your Name

Chapter 1: Ignorance is Bliss

"_I wrote your name in the sand, but the ocean washed it away_

_I wrote your name in the clouds, but the wind blew it away_

_I wrote your name in my heart, where forever it will stay"_

His intention was to come home a few days early and surprise his lover Steve. He'd been away in Tokyo, Japan on a business trip marketing some of Stark Industries new clean energy products to some of the conglomerate businesses. A week away from Steve was more than enough to put Tony in the mood for a hot bath with the super soldier and even a little take out before bed but he couldn't wait to feel the man's strong arms around him once again. Entering mansion through the front gate, Tony made a passing comment to Jarvis to keep his arrival quiet as he wanted to surprise his lover. Parking, Tony noticed a new vehicle parked in the turnaround but immediately figured that someone from SHIELD was over. Slightly put off that there was someone else at the house, since Natasha and Clint were on a recon mission in Bulgaria, Thor was in Asguard, and Bruce was… taking some personal time away from all the chaos that the Avenger mansion provided to his everyday life Tony decided that it was enough to just see Steve; they could catch up later. Slowly pushing the side door open, Tony quietly made his way towards the noise in the living room. He could easily identify Steve's but the other was that of a female, and she didn't sound like agent Hill or any of the other agents who have been known to stop by and deliver files.

Stepping through the kitchen and into the living room to say hello to his lover before heading upstairs to change, all breath escaped Tony's body at the sickening site before him. Unable to breathe, his grip on his keys loosened sending them falling to the hard wood floors with a resonating clatter that jerked the two on the couch apart in an instant. Tony locked eyes with Steve and fought the overwhelming urge to pass out.

When they started dating, Tony could remember everyone lecturing him—some multiple times—about how everyone, including Rhodey and Happy, would kick his ass into the next generation if he ever treated Steve the way he used to treat his one night stands; if he ever hurt Steve. Natasha's warning was the scariest as it involved mutilation to his genitals if he ever dared cross their Captain who deserved much better than the likes of Tony Stark, and in the beginning Tony completely accepted that knowing that he would ruin Steve and chase him away like all the rest. But his kisses were soft and sincere, his words were tender, and over all Steve was more than enough to keep Tony satisfied with his doting nature upon Tony's abrasive self. With Steve, Tony could breathe again and feel the world move around him. It was then that he vowed that he would never do anything to jeopardize what they had and poured himself into the relationship because he felt safe enough in Steve's arms, knowing that the old-fashioned man would never intentionally hurt him. He gave the blonde his everything and more. Though not once did anyone ever warn Steve about the fragile heart of Tony Stark as no one, not even Director Fury, could have ever expected Steve to cheat.

As much as Tony wished that he hadn't noticed the writing on the walls, he play ignorant and pretended that he didn't notice the subtle changes in his lover the last few months. The first time Tony really took notice of Steve's strange behavior was three months ago. When they first started dating almost a year prior, getting Steve to stop in the middle of sex was next to impossible but one night the loud shrill screech of his ring tone cut their ears like a blade to butter and Tony had never seen Steve move so fast to answer the phone that he cursed many times throughout the day because he could never figure out how to use it. Steve excused himself from their bedroom after slipping into a pair of basketball shorts and disappeared to another part of the mansion to take the phone call. He didn't return for hours, long after Tony had fallen asleep. The next thing Tony tried to ignore was the late night texting when Steve thought the engineer was asleep next to him. Tony watched the clock for hours one night wondering who the blonde could be conversing with and couldn't shake the unsettling feeling in the pit of his stomach that the winds were changing upon his horizon. His back was to the blonde, as if he couldn't see it, it wasn't happening. He didn't want to appear to be concerned and ask who was so important that late at night, so he let it go and pretended not to notice how every text seemed to break him little by little.

As far as the team was concerned, Steve and Tony appeared to be the happy couple but even around their friends Tony noticed how Steve wouldn't touch him nearly as much and would prefer the company of the others most times over him. The last barbeque that they had set up as a team bonding exercise, Tony opted out of in favor of locking himself in his lab to work quietly on some project for Stark Industries. He received the third degree over it the next day when Natasha found him, but he brushed it off because he could handle her attitude better than Steve's distant nature. It made him sick at the thought of Steve pushing him away, but at some point Tony convinced himself that it was because of something he had done. Maybe it was his late night's down in the lab that infuriated Steve, or his tendency to absorb his mind into his work that pushed Steve to his limits with him. Maybe Steve was fed up that Tony was hardly around or maybe his past had finally crept up to bite him in the ass? We wasn't positive what had happened between them, but he was okay with accepting the blame so long as Steve still held a special spot for Tony in his heart.

Even the sex that used to be passionate and full of the raw need to be with each other was now nothing short of what Tony's late night stands used to feel like. A quick release followed by an even faster escape to another part of the house afterwards. There were many times Tony would roll over after Steve had left and just stared at the empty spot beside him until the sun would peek through the blinds. He wasn't sleeping and he sure wasn't eating, old habits resurfacing that Steve had fought for months to correct in the beginning. The past few months Tony knew he wasn't feeling well, an unsettled stomach and other symptoms he chalked up to be flulike, but dismissed it as the stress over his body. Pepper commented once that Tony was little a little worse for wear, and even asked if everything was okay at home between himself and Steve. Tony denied everything and made the excuse that he hadn't been feeling well that week, something he used to tell Pepper all the time as a means to get his assistant to leave him alone. She didn't need to be bothered with his personal drama, no one did.

The team didn't know about it, and if Tony had his way they never would because he wasn't sure how any of them would react knowing the abuse Tony had started to endure in the darkness of the shadows of their home. Steve was generally mindful to only get in verbal disagreements with the brunette when they were the only ones home, and it was even Steve who snapped at Jarvis to give them some privacy; mom and dad couldn't argue in front of the kids. Tony didn't mind it so much that Steve was ordering around his AI, but even with the unconscious thought that Jarvis was always looking out for him created a sense of ease over the engineer. Sometimes he didn't want to be around Steve when they were alone because he had a tendency to manhandle Tony a little too roughly. Any exposed bruises that the team noticed Tony passed off as something from a recent mission, though if any of the team saw the ones hidden under his shirt, down his body, or on his legs he was positive he was going to have a harder time explaining those. Tony continually told himself that Steve didn't mean it, that he was still trying to control his strength by adapting to his new body, but even Tony found it hard to excuse the blonde when he snatched the genius' wrist and managed to break his radial bone.

Reaching a weak hand out to catch himself on the wall, Tony starred disbelievingly at the two on the couch. She was a pretty girl Tony would admit that with her long dark brown hair that trailed down her exposed back, lightly tanned skin and equally dark eyes with a body that most supermodels desired. Steve's massive hands were glued around her supple breasts, paused in the action of massage her nipples where as her hand was firmly planted in the center of Steve's chest and the other supporting herself on the back of the couch. Steve's knees were bent in the air, but from Tony's vantage point he could see the front of his khaki's were lying open and sticking out from under her thighs. She was saddled perfectly in his seat, straddling either side of his chiseled body with her legs. The only thing covering what Tony was positive was happening on the couch was the flimsy material of her free flowing skirt. Biting back the bile that was rising in his throat, the genius offered a soft, sad smile before excusing himself to escape to their room in the upper levels of the mansion.

He couldn't see it because it meant it was real…

He tried to make his exit look as painless as possible, but he knew he ascended the stairs a little too fast for Steve to easily pass off that one of his friends had just caught him fucking a girl on the couch. When the solid oak door closed behind him, Tony sank to his knees in the center of the room unable to shake the suffocating feeling that their bedroom provided. There were too many happy memories here and every one of them reminded Tony of what used to be and what never should have been.

It was a long while before Steve slowly made his way into their room, leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed over his chest in a defensive manner and fixing Tony with his icy cobalt eyes. Tony didn't have to turn to know he was standing there, he could feel the steely gaze from his rooted spot in the center of their room. "You okay?"

Ignoring the strong urge to snap at Steve, he knew it wouldn't solve anything other than the two of them getting into one of their famous fights that they managed to keep hidden from the rest of the team. Tony's clenched fists shook painfully at his sides as he tried to control his surging emotions that were threatening to erupt within himself. He could no longer ignore the signs as the most obvious one of all was what he saw in the living room. "Who is she?" Was all he was able to grind out through his clenched teeth.

"Natalie is a sergeant from NYPD." Steve's voice was emotionless and cold.

"How long?" Tony had to know, he had to know just how long Steve had been stringing him along. Standing up in a sudden rage, he turned to face the blonde with a void expression on his face. He could handle Pepper leaving him from Happy as he had Steve to pick up the pieces of the broken man she left behind, but when he knew how fragile Tony was and he still went and did the same thing Tony was at a loss as to how to cope. He couldn't breathe.

"She's good for me—"Tony didn't want to hear how well they complemented each other, he couldn't because he thought he was the only one for Steve. At least that's what Steve used to tell him.

"How long?" He repeated, his voice elevating a few octaves. His feet carried him the few steps to close the distance between their bodies. Starring up at Steve with a hard expression, he pleaded to know how long the soldier had been toying with him. "I need to know."

Steve pushed Tony a step back, getting the shorter man out of his face. The engineer faltered slightly, catching himself on the wall before righting his posture. "Four months," it was the only thing Steve needed to say. Steve watched with a detached image as Tony sunk to his knees, his head falling forward to rest pleadingly on Steve's knees. A portion of this last year was all a lie, his life was a lie because Steve never truly cared for him to begin with. "Get off!" Kicking Tony off harder than he intended to, the soldier watched in horror as his lover's body launched off the floor to land a few feet back in the center of the room. Tony looked up at the blonde with pleading eyes, noticing a flash of emotion surge through him that made him think that they could fix this but as fast as the expression made its way to Steve's face it was gone just as fast. "We're through Tony."

And he left…

Tony lay curled up on the floor, unmoving for what felt like an eternity, what was only thirty minutes felt like a lifetime, until the sounds of Clint and Natasha rummaging around downstairs lifted to his ears. He could hear the familiar slam of the refrigerator followed by the clatter of the cupboards of Clint rummaging through the storage in search of something to snack on to sedate his hunger. Natasha was calling out for Tony, probably wondering where he was as she had more than likely seen his expensive sports car parked in the lot. He wanted to call out to her, beg for someone to acknowledge him, but the brain signals didn't make it to the muscles in his mouth to get him to call out for help. In truth he didn't want it, but it was ingrained into him that at this point he had hit rock bottom and he was going to need someone to help pick him up.

Instead, he lay motionless on the floor listening to the two special agents in the floor below search the basement and first floor wondering where Tony was. It was when he heard Natasha's gentle footsteps head up the stairs that he started to panic. Her room was directly across from his and Steve's, she would surely see the weak man that Steve left in a heap on the floor. Panic struck through his very being but he still couldn't move be it from his numb limbs or the searing pain in his side from where Steve's foot connected with his body. Repulsed with himself, he squeezed his eyes shut in hopes that when she passed his open door she would just move on by and pay any attention to the broken man inside. Clint too as his room was just past theirs.

His prayers went unanswered as Clint was the first one to find him. The slap of his boots against the floors jarred Tony from his daze before the blonde gently rolled Tony onto his back, cradling his head between his thighs. "Tasha!" The worry in his voice was heart breaking to Tony as he didn't deserve their pity.

Small hands were lifting his shirt to expose the severely bruised skin and the cut that ran the expanse of his rib cage. The two agents were barking questions at Tony and growing steadily annoyed with his lack of will to answer. "Did you get a hold of Steve?" Carding his fingers through Tony's soft hair, Clint starred down at his team mate with a dark fury hidden behind his normal stoic face.

"No, he's not picking up." She sighed before looking back at Tony's darkly bruised side before her eyes skipped across the rest of his body to notice the yellow and green discolorations of other bruises that were healing over. "I think some of those are broken, I'm calling the medical team from SHIELD to come in and have a look at him. Here, see if you can get this to stop bleeding." Pulling off her black tee, Natasha handed it over to the other agent not at all bothered that she was now only wearing her bra before the other two men in the room. Clint allowed an approving eye to travel over the curves of her body before taking the shirt and holding it to Tony's side.

Biting back a scream that came out as a strangled cry, Tony's hands sprung to life as he tried to fight against the pressure Clint was holding to his battered thoracic cavity. "Easy Tony, the med-team should be here soon. Just relax, okay." Having a mothering nature wasn't something Clint would say he was proud of, but Tony was a part of his team and clearly in need of a friend.

While Natasha was on the phone with multiple different people trying to figure out what had happened, Clint looked down and noticed for the first time in a few months just how skinny Tony Stark had become. He knew there was a change in behavior in the engineer as they all saw the fast change from the loud personality that couldn't be tamed to the meager shell of a man who once stood so proud. He and Tony used to be the same size, but by the added notches to the expensive belt and the bunched fabric around his waist, Clint guessed that they were a good four sizes in difference now. Even the toned muscles on the thirty-year-olds body had withered away to nothing, leaving his skin pulled tight over the expanse of his ribs. Natasha returned with a sad smile on her face in regards to the billionaire lying on the floor.

"I still can't get a hold of Steve, this isn't like him. Do you think something's happened to him?" Placing her hands on her hips, the fiery red head tried not to look down at the broken Tony on the floor. Even though he was a few years older than herself, Natasha found him to be like her kid-brother and to see him like this only made her stomach clench in a painful manner. Kneeling down beside him, she allowed her fingers to trail lightly over the semi-conscious man's face trying to rouse a reaction out of him.

"Cap is strong enough to fend for himself, but I would say something to the director in case someone got the jump on him. Keep trying either way, if I were Steve I would want to know what was going on with Tony."

Tony was numb to their gentle touches and even if he wanted to respond he couldn't as it hurt more than anything to explain to them that Steve did this, that Steve was the reason why he was in so much pain. He wanted to kick himself over and over for allowing himself to fall full heartedly in love with the blonde, and even more so for allowing himself to become dependent upon the other. He knew people were all the same—abusive—but he wanted to believe for a moment that not everyone was like his father, that not everyone were power hungry thieves like Stane, and that maybe someone did truly care for him on some level other than his brilliance. Closing his eyes, unable to manage the hurt expression of the two agents, Tony shut himself off from the rest of the world and locked himself back into the dark recess in his mind. It was a scary place that he thought he'd never see again, but at least there he knew no one could hurt him and little by little he would rebuild his walls and maybe he would be okay again if given some time.

Maybe he could fix himself so Steve would want him again…

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

A/N Oh my, that got dark. Sorry for this guys, but I am so sick of reading stories where Tony is always the one who screws up and as believable as that is, I think Steve is just as flawed in his own ways and is just as likely—if not more—to turn the tables on Tony. I blame this on the many late nights of listening to Country music and a recent break up of my own. Let me know what you guys think, I love reading your reviews!


	2. Chapter 2

I Wrote Your Name

Chapter 2: Get Through This

"_I wrote your name in the sand, but the ocean washed it away_

_I wrote your name in the clouds, but the wind blew it away_

_I wrote your name in my heart, where forever it will stay"_

Bruce leaned heavily against the counter in his office in the medical center at the SHIELD headquarters. His glasses were held loosely between his fingers, while his other hand worked the tension loose from his forehead in a slow massaging motion. He wished he could have said that he saw red when the SHIELD medics brought Tony in on a cot, followed closely by a very concerned pair of super special agents, but that wouldn't come close to describing the green rage he felt when his eyes settled on the damage Tony sustained in his own home. Bruce's first thought was that something happened to Tony overseas while he was away in Japan but when Steve never showed up at the medical center the good doctor knew immediately something was wrong. He never said anything, no one did, but a few months ago Steve would have been crawling the walls if he learned that something like this had happened to the genius and now when Tony needed him the most their blonde captain was nowhere to be seen.

Since no one was sure what had happened to the brilliant engineer, the medics brought him in strapped to a back board and outfitted with a snug fitting cervical collar with an IV drip inserted into his veins. When Bruce had taken up the position at the clinic to continue to practice medicine on the injured SHIELD agents who would come back banged up, battered and bruised none of his previous patients made his stomach tighten the way Tony did. Bruce had never really seen the arc reactor up close, as Tony generally hid the revolutionary device from the team and the world most of the time, but the scars mushrooming out from around the epicenter looked just as painful as the day they blemished his skin. The dark discoloration on his side pushed the doctor to call for scans of the man's chest cavity, and when they came back he was surprised to see two fractured ribs—instead of the whole side being one cluster-fuck of broken bones. But what really drew in Bruce's curiosity were the yellow and green bruises that littered Tony's body like smudge marks.

Looking down at the nurse's notes, his eyes focusing on the large, loopy handwriting, he bit down on his bottom lip as a means to calm himself down. Katie was a very through nurse, one of his favorite staff members, but he had a hard time believing that there were bruises all down Tony's body. She brought it to his attention when she was helping him out of the pair of bloodied jeans and into a pair of comfy grey sweatpants. Before she was hired on with SHIELD, the bubbly auburn haired nurse worked at the metro clinic where she saw patient after patient who came in with the same markings all down their bodies. They all had one thing in common, and Bruce refused to believe that Steve would ever do something that heinous to Tony. He tried to tell himself that they were the remains from earlier battle wounds Tony sustained from his Ironman suit, but Bruce knew that Tony had upgraded the impact system to take the brunt of nearly all hits so all he would feel was a stiff soreness in his muscles the next morning. He wished he could believe that it was just the hazards of the job, he wished he could be just that blind.

"Doctor Banner?" Katie softly knocked on the metal framing of his door, her small fingers curling around the chilled metal as she peeked into his private office with a sad smile on her face. He looked at her with hard eyes, something the girl had become accustomed to when he was either tired or after a hard case had come in, and tried to hold everything in as he knew he couldn't lash out at the girl for no reason. It wasn't Katie's fault that Tony was laying in a hospital bed after all. "I just wanted to inform you that Ironman—I mean, Mr. Stark is awake again." She nodded her head at him before disappearing back down the hall back to the nurses' station to monitor the other patients laid up in the clinic.

Straightening his back, Bruce folded Tony's chart up under his arm before slipping his glasses back over the bridge of his nose and making his way down the hall towards the one room where his friend was laying with a glazed expression over his soft features. Flattening down the surface of his dark blue scrubs Bruce took a second look at his friend, doing a double take as he truly believed he wasn't seeing what he was seeing. Dropping the chart to the ground, the contents sliding lazily across the smooth floor in multiple directions, Bruce threw open the door to the man's room with an expression of horror written across his face. The sudden intrusion startled the engineer on the bed, causing his hands that were loosely holding the glowing reactor in his palms to jerk and pulling tight on the cord connected to the plating in his chest. "Are you insane?" Bruce screamed, trying to keep the _other guy_ back in the far recess of his mind.

Rushing forward and carefully removing the glowing device from Tony's shaking hands, Bruce tentatively pushed the arc reactor back into the socket walls around Tony's sternum. A soft click echoed about the room and Bruce felt the air return to his lungs knowing the thing keeping his friend alive was back in its place deep in his chest. He didn't want to think what Tony would have done if he hadn't gotten there any later, he couldn't picture his life without the whirlwind of energy that was Tony Stark. Unlike everyone else who walked about him like they were stepping on eggshells, Tony overtly tested the man's patients by poking and prodding at him. At times the engineer really got on his nerves, but he knew just how far to push and knew when to stop to allow Bruce to calm down. If Bruce was being honest with himself, Tony was his best friend and as much as he hated relying on someone he depended on Tony for a sense of normality.

Gripping Tony's limp wrists in his hands, forcing those dexterous fingers away from the device in his chest, Bruce was torn with calling Katie in to tie him up in a set of soft restrains and throwing him out the window for even thinking about doing something so incredibly stupid. "What's going on?" Clint's voice called from the doorway.

Bruce didn't break eye contact with Tony, holding the younger man's eyes with his own in fear that if he looked away Tony would pull away and start for the reactor once more. "It's okay, I've got it covered, Clint." Holding the engineer's gaze with his own for a moment longer, Bruce slowly uncurled his fingers from Tony's wrists sensing that Tony wasn't a danger to himself anymore. He trusted him not to do anything stupid in front of them. As flashy as Tony was in front of the media, he wasn't so bold as to harm himself in front of the team. Turning back to look at the shaken blonde, Bruce offered a small smile. "Has Steve shown up yet?" Neither Bruce nor Clint missed the flash of emotion that cracked across the darkness in the man's eyes.

Leaning fully against the frame, Clint rubbed a hand through his hair to come at a rest as the base of his skull to rub away the tension building in his neck muscles. "No, Tasha contacted him initially twelve hours ago and he hasn't once responded. Director Fury has issued a BOLO to all SHILED agents with strict orders to bring him into base if found. I'm worried because this isn't like Cap." Working his fingers into the tired muscles, Clint dropped his arm to bring it at a rest in front of his chest. "Has Tony said anything?"

Bruce looked to the man in question, hating how they were talking about him as if he wasn't present in the room. Resisting the urge to reach out and touch the stoic man on the bed he looked back to Clint and shook his head slightly. "One of my nurses informed me that he just woke up actually. I think it would be beneficial to try to get him to eat something, would you be so kind as to head down to the nurse's station to have Katie ready his med's and work on getting him something to eat?" Clint nodded curtly before disappearing from the threshold.

As hard as Bruce tried to get the brunette to speak, let alone eat something of substance other than allowing him to get his nutrients from the IV drip in his arm, the brunette never moved from his seated position on the bed, only able to stare off into the far corner with an expressionless face. Bruce worried momentarily that it was the drugs affecting him so, disabling the man to function properly but after reading over the chart that the nurses put back together he found that the dosing was just right. Easing the man into a laying position Bruce tucked the blankets up around his shoulders, allowing his fingers to brush through the dark locks of hair on his head in a comforting gesture. Steve was still missing and as worried as Bruce was over Tony's wellbeing he was equally worried as it wasn't normal for the Captain to just disappear for extended periods of time. It wasn't until the following day when a team of four escorted Captain Rogers into the medical wing.

The blondes expression was hard, and if Bruce didn't know any better he would jump to the conclusion that Steve had been out drinking his kidneys into a grave. Resisting the urge to run up to the unharmed soldier, Bruce waited in the shadows of his office listening intently to the loud discussion between Steve and Natasha outside.

"Where were you?" She questioned sternly.

Steve folded his arms over his chest defensively and took a step back in a failed attempt to put space between himself and the fiery redhead. "I would have figured Tony would have told you guys by now."

"Told us what?" Her questions were short and crisp. Worrying her bottom lip with her teeth, the agent crossed her arms in a mimicking manner to match Steve's defensive body language. "Steve, Tony has been catatonic ever since he was brought in. What happened?" Her sigh was loud, revealing just how tired she was.

Steve narrowed his gaze on her petite body. "This is ridiculous! He's being childish and dragging all of you into this too? Typical Tony Stark! I don't know why I didn't listen to you guys in the beginning, but my ears are wide open now for an _I told you so_. Come on, I need to hear it." Natasha wasn't amused by Steve's own childish outburst. His wild gesturing hands brought on red flags in the agents head, making her feel weary about Steve. "Say it! I deserve it!"

"You two broke up?" The words sounded so wrong to her because as far as she knew the two were a happy couple. Natasha knew she didn't have much to go by, as herself and Clint were usually out for months at a time working recon and intelligence missions all over the globe, but when they were home she was positive she never picked up on hints that Steve and Tony had a stain placed on their relationship. "What did he do?" She wasn't being fair to Tony, and she knew it too, but the man's track record wasn't something that she could easily ignore. "Steve!"

"He's Tony-fucking-Stark, isn't that enough reason?" Reigning himself in, Steve leaned against the wall dragging his massive hand over his face to rub wearily at his temples that were throbbing. "Just let Tony get over his little hissy fit and go back to your own lives, I know mine is waiting for me back at the truck."

He turned to leave and only made a face paces when Natasha's soft voice trickled to his ears. "Where did the bruises come from, Steve?" She knew he had to have seen them, and she was even more appalled that he hadn't said anything about them. Natasha had an extensive talk with the friendly nurse up front who filled her in with the gruesome details of the bruises that littered the expanse of his body and she didn't want to think about the accusations she was making, but at the current moment her thoughts were plagued by images of Steve placing his hands on Tony in anything over than a loving gentle nature. His stride stopped, making the soldier cock his head to the side to look sidelong at the agent behind him. "What did you do Steve?"

"What we do is dangerous work, Tasha, you know that." He was gone within moments, leaving the entire clinic in awe of the gravity of what they just heard.

Bruce's fists were balled so tightly he was amazed he wasn't curling his fingers against the agony his tendons were feeling under such pressure. As much as he wanted to Hulk out and chase down the super-solider and beat the answers out of him he knew his time and efforts would be put too much better use in the stark white room that Tony lay in. Steve's answer was more than enough evidence to convince the jury in his mind that Steve was guilty for a majority of those marks on Tony's body. He didn't really try to hide the fact that he did it, though the thing that really angered the doctor was that he didn't feel the least bit remorseful about inflicting the damage upon the weaker man. Looking across the office to focus his gaze on a silent Clint who was sitting in the shadows, Bruce wanted to argue with the blonde not to chase after Steve because nothing either of the agents, or Bruce as himself, could do to Steve to even affect him. There was always the option of getting the police involved, or in this case the SHIELD prosecutor who oversaw all cases involving all SHIELD agents, but what person in their right mind was going to convict Steve of domestic violence?

"I'd kill him if I could." Clint muttered before sweeping out of the room in a fluid motion.

"I think I know a few people who would let you too, Clint." Bruce muttered to himself before looking back down at the charts of the other patients he was overseeing. Most were in for broken bones, lacerations, and even the one had a concussion but none of them were on the top of his priority list.

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

Tony looked around his bedroom he used to share with Steve before turning with pleading eyes to look at Natasha who had a firm grip upon his body, too afraid to let go in fear that he would topple over. The blood stain on the hardwood floors was still visible even after many attempts to properly clean it up by the cleaning staff. She helped him under the covers before moving to quickly leave the room, unsure how to approach the situation that was a foreign topic to her. Asking Jarvis to shut the lights off, she quietly crept across the hall, reminding the genius that she was just a call away before disappearing into the safety of her own room. They were all tired and could all use a good night sleep to think clearly on how to handle the situation between Tony and Steve.

It was nearing close to the early hours of the morning when the genius finally threw back the covers, unable to stand the suffocating feeling of Steve around him in the room. Tentatively moving around the room, mindful of the stain on the floor, he reached the hall without incident and quickly found himself curled up on the couch in the living room. How he got there amazed him as he didn't remember moving down the stairs or even curling into the soft fabric of the plush couch but there he was starring at a muted TV screen with fast moving pictures of the local news station feeding the media their usual garbage on life, morals, politics, and the occasional lunatic that happened to slip under the radar. Shivering from the chill the room offered, the genius bolted upright and to his feet when the large afghan blanketed his body. The threaded blanket fell to the floor in a heap as Clint took a tentative step back holding his hands up defensively to Tony's terrified expression. "Easy, soldier, it's just me."

Tony's body visibly relaxed, creating a calming aura about the room as both men tried to ignore the giant purple and green polka-dotted elephant suspended from the ceiling. Moving around the couch Clint laid down where Tony's body once was and motioned for him to join him. Tony's muscles froze, already not liking the way the agent was treating him, but when the blonde's hands reached out to pull him gently into the curve of his body Tony relaxed once again, enjoying the warmth from the body of his teammate. "Don't worry; I'm not going to try anything." Tony knew as much, but it was nice to hear it come from the man's mouth as he was pretty sure the blonde was captivated with a certain redheaded agent.

Resting his head on Clint's gently rising and falling chest, Tony found himself counting the cadence of the marksman's heartbeat, something that used to calm him down when he couldn't sleep and Steve was around to soothe him. The archer's hands were comfortingly running along his back, massaging the tense muscles while being mindful of the tender areas. "I did this for my mother," he admitted after a period of silence. No one knew much of Clint's childhood, but judging by the usual cold exterior, Tony wouldn't say it was a leap of faith to guess that it wasn't the picture perfect Kodak family. "It's not right what he did, Tony, it's never okay. I tried to convince my mom many times, and would hold her just like this after many fights between herself and my dad, but she wouldn't listen and before I knew it my momma was an angle in the ground. She left me with my mean old man. I know what it's like to be on the receiving end Tony. I just want you to know you're not alone; that you don't need Steve."

The two locked eyes for a moment, Tony searching for the lie he was sure there as he didn't want to believe that someone else ever had to endure the pain he suffered by someone who he thought loved him. Like the blonde, Tony didn't have an amazing childhood so to speak but he knew that a parent should never lay a hurtful hand to their child and to think of Clint in that situation put the brunette on edge. It was evident by the conviction in the marksman's voice that he still felt really strongly about the subject.

He reached awkwardly to the floor to pick up to dropped afghan to flick out over the length of Tony's backside, making sure to cover his feet in the process. When he heard the wobbly footsteps head down the hall, an instant reminder of his childhood, Clint knew he couldn't let Tony lay out here all alone for the remainder of the night. There was no doubt in his mind that Tony hadn't slept a wink since the three Avengers brought him back to the mansion and he couldn't really blame him as he wouldn't want to sleep in the same room that brought back the good and the bad memories of such a strong relationship with their captain. If and when Steve ever decided to come back, Clint was going to make sure to have the man's things removed back into his old room at the end of the hall that hadn't been used since the two hooked up. If he had his way, Steve would have to sleep outside but he knew from experience that Tony was going to allow him back into the home that he shared with the team because that's what his mother always did; she always let that bastard back in no matter how much he pleaded.

Struggling with himself to not fall asleep, to stay awake and keep vigil over the distressed brunette, Clint felt his eyes slip shut a few times before they finally found a resting place. He wanted to wait until Tony fell asleep, but it would be a lost cause because without the added drugs in his system the agent knew that Tony wouldn't submit himself to the shadows of his mind so willingly to be reminded of the torment that Steve had put him through. His right arm slid off the side of the couch, fingers brushing the surface of the plush rug in the center of their shared space, as his left firmly held Tony in place on his chest. If Tony tried to get up Clint knew he would be instantly jarred awake to deter Tony's escape.

They would get through this together, as a team—which sadly included Steve—because there would come a day where the world would call upon them for help and with the deep fissure running through their team camaraderie Clint subconsciously knew only disaster would await them. They had to get through this to save their makeshift, dysfunctional family they created among themselves. They just had to…

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

A/N HOLY REVIEWS AND ALERTS YOU GUYS! I went to work, and when I came home to check my e-mail not nine hours later I thought my inbox was going to explode. I was really nervous about posting this initially because I wasn't sure how everyone was going to accept it and if I can correctly judge this by your appreciative reviews I think a majority of you loved it, hated and loved it, or just cried all the way though. I'll admit, this chapter was tough to start because I kind of outdid myself in the first one with the emotional effect of Steve being nothing short of an abusive/cheating lover. I rewrote this chapter many times from Tony's perspective, Steve's perspective, and then I finally landed on their teammate's response to the whole situation. I hope I made it emotional enough, bringing it to a dark place for all members because in a abusive domestic relationship it's not just the couple that suffers but everyone around them too (i.e. Natasha not sure how to act around Tony, Clint understanding from drawing from experience, and Bruce being the supportive friend who just wants to impale Steve with his fist). I personally think overall, going back with my earlier statement from chapter one, that I think Steve would be the one to cheat as dating a man back in the 1940's wasn't kosher nor is Steve a perfect person as everyone makes him out to be and as much as I hate to say this I'm really enjoying writing this. Leave your comments in the box below, I love hearing from my readers to see how well/how terrible I'm doing. You guys are amazing! Here's a shout out to everyone who reviewed and alerted this because you all made my day!


	3. Chapter 3

I Wrote Your Name

Chapter 3: You Don't Know Him Like I Do

"_I wrote your name in the sand, but the ocean washed it away_

_I wrote your name in the clouds, but the wind blew it away_

_I wrote your name in my heart, where forever it will stay"_

Running an exhausted hand through his mussed hair, Bruce blearily glanced around the shared living space to note Clint relaxed in one of the black leather recliners watching mind numbing cartoons. He understood the archer's exhaustion because keeping a watchful eye over Tony Stark had turned out to be more than a fulltime job; they were already into overtime. The sight of his friend, comrade holding the arc reactor in his hands was still engrained in his thoughts and constantly in the forefront of his mind. It was like Tony forgot how to breathe without Steve in his life, whether his presence is good or bad he was still involved in Tony's life. Leaning against the frame of the hall, Bruce sighed heavily and allowed his eyes to wander to the brightly colored animations moving across the screen. He remembered the cartoon from his childhood days, and the feud between Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fud always brought a smile to his face but given the circumstances even the grey bunny turning the hunters gun on him wasn't nearly as entertaining as he'd hoped.

"Have you eaten yet?" Bruce noted how Clint had taken to mothering Tony a little more than himself and Natasha. He wanted to ask, pry a little bit, just to see if there was a reason for Clint's helicopter behavior but he doubted the archer would tell him anything. Bruce knew he could always ask Jarvis to hack into the marksman's file, but that would be invasive and it could have been that the blonde had a little crush on Tony. Though as much of a womanizer as Clint was, Bruce figured even that was highly improbable. "Clint?"

"Yeah, I ate earlier but I couldn't get Tony to eat. He's locked himself in his lab again." Readjusting his body over the large chair, the blonde glanced over to Bruce and offered a meek smile knowing he had failed his personal goal to make sure the engineer ate at least something of substance twice a day. It had been two days since the two Avengers brought Tony back to the mansion and since then it has been an uphill battle to keep the man sane.

Their first priority, thanks to Peppers futuristic thinking and knowledge of her ex, was to remove all alcohol from the tower. Natasha was familiar with Tony's self-destructive tendencies, and while the boys brought Tony home from the SHIELD recovery room she went around the entire mansion and discretely removed every bottle. Enlisting Jarvis for help, she even found Tony's private stash. Even she had to admit she never would have thought to look in those certain places and had to give it up to Tony for being so creative. The first day everyone watched Tony go to every single hiding space in search for the mind numbing beverages and every time he came up short he would throw a minor temper tantrum and storm off to another. It was only when he woke up this morning that he took to keeping his hands busy in his workshop.

Their second priority was to keep Tony away from Steve. The blonde still lived at the mansion, so they would allow him back in if need be but everyone had mixed feelings about how to handle their captain and his recent abusive behavior. There was no doubt his little show at the clinic confirmed all their suspicions about the man but what they were going to do was another story all together. Bruce knew they would cross that bridge once they got to it.

Clint tried to remove Steve's things from Tony's room and that only seemed to cause more distress to the brunette. Bruce understood where the blonde was coming from, the whole _out of sight out of mind_ notion filling lies in his head, but they all knew Tony didn't want to forget Steve; didn't want to or couldn't was a fine line that none were sure if they could cross. The few times they got him to talk, all Tony would say was that he didn't want the team to blame Steve for his misfortune. He openly admitted to Natasha, whether on a slip of the tongue or he really meant to share such a dark feature of his relationship, which Steve had on more than one occasion struck him and every time he blamed himself for the strike. It was like he had a form of Stockholm Syndrome and no matter what Steve did to him, he would always love and care for America's Golden Boy.

Bruce later that evening found found Tony in the middle of the large bed he shared with Steve, clutching the blondes pillow to his chest, starring off into the darkness of the night outside his window. The two super spies were already asleep in their rooms both resting up before their departure for a new mission involving something with SHIELD and Doctor Doom. Carefully stepping into Tony's bedroom, mindful of the man skittish nature, Bruce slowly moved around so he was kneeling eye to eye with the shell of a broken man. His dark eyes were fixed out the large window that over looked Ontario, unseeing as he appeared to be lost in his own thoughts. Bruce had to wonder if Tony even knew he was there. Slowly reaching out to place a careful hand on the man's knee, Bruce frowned at Tony's instant knee-jerk reaction to flinch away. "Easy," Bruce soothed.

"Sorry, you just startled me." The vice like grip on the blonde's pillow lessened, allowing the pillow to sag against Tony's body. "Did you need something?" Using his right hand, Tony slowly dragged his fingers over his face to further draw himself into the conversation while his other subconsciously mothered Steve's pillow.

"Just putting you to bed, you really should get some sleep Tony so you don't get sick." Reaching to turn down the linens, Bruce turned an expectant eye to the genius as he slowly maneuvered his hips onto his side of the bed. Drawing the blankets up into his lap, Bruce sat fully on Steve's side of the bed.

Tony unconsciously glared at the man. "I won't get sick; you guys are worrying too much."

"Someone has to worry about you." Bruce admitted before reaching behind Tony to fluff up the man's personal pillow. He didn't bother trying to take the one from Tony's hands, as he had a feeling Tony wouldn't give it up, instead he leaned heavily against the oak headboard and allowed his eyes to train themselves to the window to the outside world. "You're a member of this team Tony, and whether you believe it or not we all care about you."

Resisting the urge to act like a small child and throw a tantrum as a means to get Bruce to leave, Tony held it in already knowing Bruce wasn't going to fall for any of his crap. "I don't want you guys to worry about me."

"Is that why you never said anything about Steve before?"

Tony nodded slowly. "Do we have to talk about this?"

Bruce looked away from the moonlit water into the stormy eyes of the man beside him. "You should talk to someone, Tony. It's not good to keep all this bottled up." Bruce wanted to laugh at his own words as he was the master of bottled emotions. He knew just how dangerous emotions like this were once they festered for a long enough time and just because Tony wasn't going to Hulk out and destroy half the city he could fall into his bad habits once again and become a danger to himself. "Steve isn't worth all this and you know that, Tony. You deserve so much better."

"Do I?" There was a dry laugh. "Look at me Bruce! In case you haven't forgotten, I'm the reason hundreds of people are dead." Frustrated, Tony threw back the blankets and paced wildly about his bedroom, mind already moving into a dark direction where he knew he wouldn't be able to stop the overflow of emotions as they were about to spill from the dam in his mouth. "Three soldiers died to protect me and how did I repay them? By building a bigger weapon of mass destruction to inflict more damage upon the world! Do you really think I deserve your pity, your worry because I should have seen this all coming? I should have known that whatever deity overlooks this world was just mocking me by putting Steve into my life. I should have known…"

Bruce watched from his seated position as Tony paced about the room in a fury. As much as he wanted to correct the brunette and tell him otherwise he knew he couldn't because this may be the only breakdown that Tony was going to allow himself. He was too proud to be submitted to tears on more than one occasion, but there was a possibility of the impending waterworks and thankfully he was prepared.

"I still remember how scared I was when Steve first kissed me…"

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

It was like any other mission or rather it was supposed to be. Fury described it as an easy intel mission where they were only supposed to gather as much information from a military base on the eastern end of Cuba. He compared it to being something like the Cuban Missile Crisis as satellite imagery had picked up photos of the Cuban's constructing biological weapons with enough kill power to annihilate the entire southern-boarder of the United States. Natasha and Clint had already infiltrated the compound, working their way deep undercover as a pair of rich Russian investors for the funding of the project. There was little work for Steve and Tony to pick up, rather than be ready for the immediate extraction of the wonder twins and be ready to divert an attack on American soil.

Though like most things in Tony's life, nothing seemed to be going right as their stone-age style of security systems somehow was able to track down Steve's hunkered position and rather than have their captain get gunned down the engineer launched himself into the air gaining the attention of the multiple sniper riflemen perched about the base. Their bullets thankfully ricocheted off his armor with nothing more than a scrape, but when Jarvis locked onto a heat-seeking biological mission locked onto his person he began to panic slightly. How he was going to blow this thing up without causing a global pandemic was beyond his comprehension as this time as he didn't have a giant hole in the sky to deposit the rocket. He could always…

"Jarvis I need more altitude, and make sure that thing is still following us." Pivoting on a sharp ninety-degree angle, Tony bolted straight up into the sky. The images displayed on his HUD visor showed the missile gaining altitude faster than he was. Due to the fact that the reactors core had been depleted during their reconnaissance Tony kept ignoring the dangerously low numbers of his battery life left in the reactor.

"_Sir, you are down to about 8% of power and that—"_

"Shut up Jarvis and activate the additional thrusters! We need to gain more altitude and fast."

"Tony, what are you doing?" He heard Steve chirp into his ear through the intercom earpieces he constructed. "Tony!"

"I got this Cap, don't worry." The additional thrusters kicked in as he climbed higher into the earth's atmosphere. Even though the suit was insulated, Tony could still feel the chilly bite of the ice build up around his suit. He had only a short amount of time left before either a) he froze or b) the missile reached its target.

"_Sir, you are at 5% power—"_

Activating his replusors and shooting twin beams of hot energy higher into the atmosphere, Tony felt the earth's gravitational pull snatch him back into the atmosphere. Without the additional power to fuel his thrusters, he became a freefalling weight in the sky tumbling head over heels and plummeting at deathly speeds towards the ocean. The impact against the water alone would be enough to crush his suit, break his skeletal system and turn his insides to jelly. Above he felt the aftershock of the missile as his repulors did their job in destroying the biological weapon and Tony could only hope that he forced the projectile high enough so there wouldn't be any casualties.

It was hard to move with the additional ice buildup but the genius managed to reach a shaking hand down to his hip to forcibly pull at a latch to release a series of stabilizers. The latch popped and the ice broke away from his suit raining down on top of him. Activating his thrusters with the last little power left in his reactor, Tony barked orders for Jarvis to shut up about his battery life and go into life saver energy just before his body dove beneath the surface of the water. His systems shut down simultaneously, dragging his weighted body deeper into the dark depths of the clear ocean blue water. Besides the rushing of water going past his head, Tony vaguely heard Steve calling out to him through his earpiece before the water pressure popped a few seams of the suit and sent him sprawling into a dark abyss.

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

After a few days of recovery in SHIELD's medical clinic, Tony had never been so happy to fall onto his own sheets. He was still sore, so when his body hit the comforter neatly tucked on his bed he let out a yelp of pain. It was enough to alert Steve, who had followed his fellow Avenger up to his room to place the small duffle in his personal space, and within an instant the blonde was by Tony's side easing him into a position of comfort. Tony released an annoyed laugh at how needy he had suddenly become, almost like an infant once again where he required assistance for even the slightest movements as the muscles in his back were still healing from the stress of the impact. He hated being this needy as it made him feel weaker than he already was.

"You should really be more careful," Steve chastised coldly. Fixing the slighter Avenger with a steely gaze, Steve's large hands came up to catch under Tony's arms and lift him so his head was perfectly nestled atop his plush pillow.

"I was trying to help you, Cap!" Tony retorted coldly, already not enjoying the third degree from the blonde. "Next time someone wants to put a few rounds into you I'll happily let them."

Steve faltered, his body hovering over Tony's with his hands splayed on either side of the man's firm flanks. Guilty cobalt blue eyes glanced down into Tony's glassy brown orbs, seeking for a silent forgiveness for the harsh words. "That's not what I meant, thank you by the way." Offering a small smile, Steve's hand slowly moved up to rearrange the dark locks of hair on top of the engineer's head. Loving the way Tony's hair felt between his fingers, Steve's hand lingered longer than anyone would deem to be a normal touch between two comrades. "I just wish you wouldn't be so reckless."

Tony's brows dipped, scrunching to make a glare up at the blonde looming over him. "So I should have just let that weapon release its destruction on the southern end of the United States? Sorry, next time I'll remember the lives of thousands that could have been affected by the biological contaminants in that blasting device weren't worth my own and next time I'll happily sacrifice their lives for my own."

"Would you stop? That's not what I meant either!" Shaking Tony, Steve flinched when a painful groan escaped from his lips. Instantly regretting his harsh treatment, Steve swallowed back a lump in his throat and forced himself to look away from the dark eyes glaring at him. "I just can't think straight when it comes to you, and I don't know why."

"Big whoop, you care about me. You care about the others too Steve, I know you do, and I never hear you complain to them how reckless they can be on missions. Why do you have to treat me like the kid-brother all the time?" Ignoring the confused look on the blondes face, instantly remembering that Steve was an only child growing up, Tony pressed on. His own anger seeping through his voice and mixing with his emotions, "what does it matter if something happens to me?"

"Do you really think that little of yourself?" Snapping his head back to look at Tony, Steve suddenly felt the need to touch him and remind himself that he hadn't died in the atmosphere where the device exploded and released its contaminants into the far reaches of space. The hand tangled in Tony's mussed hair, slid down to rest on the side of his face, cradling the bruised skin. When Tony didn't offer a viable response to Steve's question, the blonde gently leaned down to claim Tony's mouth against his own. Steve wasn't sure why he did it, but he knew he had to and if he didn't he would later regret it.

Tony, frozen in fear, gazed up into the calm blue eyes of his captain as he held his mouth against his own. The billionaire playboy had kissed many people—a few kids on the forehead for a picture, a couple of guys when he was really drunk, and more ladies than he could count and in more places that he'd care to share—but by far this had been the most awkward and most confusing kiss he'd ever received. He debated whether he could even call it as kiss as neither of them dared to move to allow their lips to slide against the others. But when Steve's eyes slid closed, allowing his momentary freak-out to slip into the dark recess of his mind, his soft lips nipped lightly at Tony's coxing a reaction out of the man made of iron.

He'd only just recently broken up with Pepper, their on-and-off again affair never lasted more than a few months but this time they were done for good as he caught her cheated with a CEO from one of the contracted companies that worked hand-in-hand with Stark Industries. Of all the times that he was with her, he was always faithfully hers and never dared to bat an eyelash at anyone else so when the shock of seeing Pepper with another guy wore off he was able to cordially end things with her on a somewhat positive note. But this only seemed to further confirm that Tony Stark wasn't meant to be in a relationship and whatever this was between himself and Captain America had to end. Now…

Slowly bringing his hands up, ignoring the tight pull from the muscles in his back, Tony applied a small amount of pressure against Steve's cotton tee in a feeble attempt to push him away. When his captain only seemed to press further into his mouth, Tony released a painful whimper remembering the immediate effect it had on the blonde earlier. Instantly, Steve broke away and starred down worriedly at the brunette praying he hadn't hurt him. Tony wanted to laugh at the idea of Steve hurting him, because outside of the Captain America guise Steve was one of those people who couldn't hurt a fly. In the end, it would be Tony who would hurt Steve and it would be Tony's fault for all the pain and suffering that would surely torment their good captain.

"I—I can't, Steve—no!" Trying to force the blonde away again as he slowly leaned forward to resume his work with his mouth, Tony squirmed only to have a real jolt of pain surge through his veins and instantly wind him of all energy he had.

"Why not?" He asked softly, his lips lightly teasing Tony's.

"It's not right, it's wrong." He whimpered, praying that his hurtful words would chase away the one thing his body was calling out for. Steve fixed Tony with a confused look, his mind quickly remembering two lovely ladies at the park holding hands and sharing indiscrete kisses with each other in broad daylight. No one seemed to care then, and no one batted an eye at the two boys at the mall who were dressed in lady-tight jeans, their hands clasped together. Steve understood that times had changed, but despite his own morals on the taboo subject of gay relationships he couldn't deny the swirling feelings he had for the brunette. "It's wrong to be with me, Steve."

"Let me make that decision." As much as Tony wanted to argue that statement, lash out and say all the hurtful things that would push Steve's buttons in the worst way to make him leave he just couldn't. His body, starved for affection that Steve was so clearly willing to give, reached out and welcomed his next advance and met his mouth halfway with a soft kiss that left the engineer a whimpering mess against the sheets. "Just let me in, Tony."

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

The waterworks never came, and Tony never finished his story as he had fallen asleep curled into Bruce's side. The dark haired scientist never took Tony to be a cuddly person, but every time he saw Tony and Steve having a romantic moment on the couch the engineer would always be curled into the captain's side. Bruce figured Tony was a touch oriented person, as he realized the dark haired man was always offering small touches to the people around him as if reminding himself that they were real and that they were there. But Tony was always fingering things, even back when Bruce first met the genius back in college the teen always had to have his hands over something. There was a joke going around that Tony absorbed information through his fingers like a sponge to water, but Bruce knew now that it ran much deeper than that.

He tried extracting himself from the dark haired man's grasp, stiffly moving his body as to not disturb his suffering friend but every time he moved Tony would unconsciously give a small whimper and hold the loose fabric of Bruce's sweats tighter between his fingers. Giving up his escape attempts, he slowly slid down to lay with his head resting on his arm now behind his head. Tony still had Steve's pillow squished against his chest, holding it with a vice like grip.

It was weird having someone curled up next to him, as the last time someone had done this he was in a relation with said person. Forcing his thoughts away from the dark haired beauty from his past, desperately trying to calm himself down, Bruce forced a few calming breaths into his body. Hulking out with Tony so vulnerable wasn't the best of ideas and he would never forgive himself if he ever hurt Tony. He was a friend, and friends didn't hurt friends like that.

_Don't dwell on it too long,_ Bruce thought bitterly knowing that if his thoughts continued he would surely loose the remainder of his cool. _He's safe now and that's all that matters. He's safe… he's safe… he's safe…_ Glancing to his side, down to a sleeping Tony, the scientist shook his head and closed his eyes. There would be time later to talk because Tony was safe and that's all that mattered. They would take this one step at a time, and slowly Bruce and the other Avengers would get Tony back to his old self. They would remind him of what life was like before the nightmare known as Steven Rogers corrupted him.

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

A/N I'm not too thrilled with how this chapter turned out, but a few of you expressed your concerns/curiosity about how Steve suddenly made the change between loving Tony to lashing out against him. Initially I wasn't going to include that, but I figured it wouldn't hurt to throw it in. Don't kill me however for Steve's reasoning being that he's afraid to love another man. This is another thing I'm getting a little annoyed with reading about… He's catholic (from the best of my understanding), military, and from the 1940's. Basically that's the trifecta of variables needed to have a severely sexually confused person. Not to mention that he's Captain America. With a title like that I think a lot of pressure would be added to make his life into the perfect typical America apple pie life; wife, kids, dog, and a house with a white picket fence.

Also, I'm really sorry for the delay in the update. Classes started up again, and lucky me I'm taking 18 credits as well as working a job that requires my attention for 60 ish hours a week right now. I feel like I'm being stretched in a million different directions, but writing is usually an outlet where I can let my frustrations out on these characters. So if this takes another dark turn in the next chapter, which I'm pretty sure it's going to, I apologize in advance…though with the way some of you are, I think you are enjoying this angst a little too much. Ah well, I'm off for now and hopefully I'll be a little quicker on my updates. No promises though.

Thanks again for all the lovely reviews you guys leave me. It's such an amazing site to see when my inbox is full of alerts, subscriptions, and reviews from all of you. It makes my day just a bit brighter. You all are amazing. Thank you!


	4. Chapter 4

I Wrote Your Name

Chapter 4: The Problem With Excuses

"_I wrote your name in the sand, but the ocean washed it away_

_I wrote your name in the clouds, but the wind blew it away_

_I wrote your name in my heart, where forever it will stay"_

Steve wanted to gag at the pungent stench of Natalie's hairspray as its fumes wafted out from the ensuite bathroom and into the bedroom. For a cop, Steve noticed that the dark haired woman hung more on the girly side and had a tendency to doll herself up just to go into work. Her hair, tied back in a tight pony tail, was curled at the ends in loose ringlets that bounced with her every step, her eyes were outlined with a thick black line of eyeliner, and even her face held copious amounts of pinup makeup to hide all her alleged _imperfections_. For a supposed professional in the police force, Steve had a hard time believing such a thing. "So you can pick up Jake this afternoon from daycare, right?" She called from the bathroom, her eyes glued to the mirror as she applied a layer of lip gloss to her full lips. "I have court all afternoon, so I won't be able to do it."

"I told you I had meetings all afternoon." Steve shot back, venom dripping from his every word. Reaching up the blonde grabbed the pillow from his girlfriend's side of the bed and smashed it over his face to drown out her incessant voice. Gagging instantly, as even the pillow held the vial smell of hairspray and the strong aroma of her perfume, Steve threw the flimsy thing across the room before forcing himself out of bed.

"Steve, I never ask you to do anything and this one time I do you can't skip out on a stupid meeting to pick up Jake?" Appearing in the archway of the bathroom, adjusting the expensive wristwatch around her bony wrist, she fixed Steve with a heated look. Watch secured, she crossed her arms expectantly.

"It's not like your department meetings where you just show up when you feel like it, Nat." He wanted to argue that SHIELD was getting ready to send him out into the field for a snatch-and-grab of a high profile prisoner over in Saudi Arabia, but that would be a breach of protocol and Director Fury would personally sink Steve in a block of ice if he were to leak such information to a civilian. Natalie knew what Steve did for a living, who the man behind the mask really was, but that's about all she knew as Steve made sure she wasn't privy to all the things he did in his personal time. "Just call John, it's his night with him anyways." Big mistake…

Peggy was right, even after all these years Steve still knew absolutely nothing about women.

"So you want me to pass my son off to that man so you can go off—"

"You were married to the guy for three years Natalie, he couldn't have been that bad! Besides, Jake has been dying to see his father for the last several months and you're the one who keeps interfering."

Steve hated mornings like this where something would crawl up his girlfriend's ass and turn her from the sweet little southern bell and into such a bitch. He hated arguing and he hated being on the receiving end of her verbal abuse for every little thing that went wrong in her life. Days like these were when Steve found himself missing the warmth of Tony's body snuggled against his own, the man's soft snores making a sweet melody in his ears rather than the screaming banshee that was Natalie. It wasn't enough that Steve had to suffer through with the woman's mood swings and violent temper, but he also found himself to be the primary caretaker for her four year old son, Jacob.

The toddler, on a good day, was generally and okay child but even at such an early age Steve could see the telltale signs of a maturing brat in the boy. Sitting at the kitchen table, a warm bowl of oats before the child, Steve silently listened to the boy yammer on about how his daddy was going to come and get him, how his daddy was going to get back together with his mommy, how his daddy was going to kick Steve's ass (Steve hated that the man taught his young son that word, and hated how Natalie never did anything to correct him), and how Steve was never going to be his daddy. It wasn't the first time Steve found himself in the midst of a conversation such as this, but he knew it wouldn't be the last. After changing his tee three times, ridding himself of the flung gobs of hot oats, Steve grabbed the sticky toddler and took him to daycare. Passing the little terror off to the less than willing caretaker at the center was one of the highlights of Steve's day.

Unlike the other children who refused to leave their parents side, Jake ran into the toy room to instantly knock down a block tower a little blonde girl had been building. Ducking out as the cries lifted to his ears, Steve made a quick bee-line for his truck. Looking down to his hands, noting their frustrated shaking, the blonde took a few calming breaths in to put his life back into perspective. He was in a relationship with the beautiful detective-sergeant from the NYPD, basically had an adoptive son, and his girlfriend's baby-daddy issues to deal with. Never mind the credit card debt the woman came with or the mortgage on a shoddy two bedroom house that she could barely afford. Dropping his head into his hands, Steve found himself wondering what he was doing most days as he had no idea how to raise a family. Striking the steering unit with his palm, Steve dropped his forehead to the leather and sighed deeply. He had five months until the little one growing inside Natalie was going to be in his arms and he was so scared.

As much as he wanted to run back to the mansion with the other Avengers and slide into bed next to Tony and forget these last few months never happened, Steve knew he couldn't. A feeling of disgust swirled in the pit of his stomach for even thinking of going back to his homosexual lifestyle with the man. He didn't think he could keep going to confession sessions at the church for such inappropriate thoughts about another man because at this point Steve didn't think he could get anymore passes from the big guy upstairs. It was easier to suppress these sinful feelings back in the 1940's where Steve knew that if anyone found out he would rather bat for the home team he'd be shot on the spot. The first time Steve saw two guys kiss in public he was sure his heart stopped as panic shook his core. He watched and waited for someone to do anything, say anything to the two men at the airport but the only thing that happened was that a business man had walked by with a look of disgust on his face. It took a while to get used to, and a little research from Jarvis, but Steve quickly learned that—for the most part—homosexuality was a widely accepted lifestyle. But just because it was accepted by society didn't mean it was right.

Steve compared gay rights to a woman's right to abortion, again another subject that was unspeakable back in his time. No matter how much he looked into the political subject all he understood was that it was murder, that a woman would be so cold as to scorn her unborn child by terminating their right to life for her mistake. Even if the argument was made that she was raped, Steve didn't want to believe that a woman would deny the innocent victim the right to life. As much as he didn't want to see the child go into foster care, he didn't want to see the child die either which was why when Natalie brought up that she could easily get an abortion for his one night of weakness four months ago Steve felt like he couldn't breathe. That child was his, a part of himself, and he couldn't allow her to just _get rid of the problem_ as she so coldly stated.

It was a stupid fight, another one of Tony's insecure moments, which wedged a knife in their relationship and forced the two of them to take a break from each other. While Steve knew he shouldn't leave Tony he knew he had to as his lover needed to sort things out and understand that no matter what Steve would always love him. Whether he believed that then or now wouldn't matter because Steve found himself in bed with the temptress and it only took one time, only one time for her to become pregnant with his child. Apparently her being on the pill and using protection wasn't enough to keep his little super-swimmers from impregnating the officer. He never wanted anyone to learn of his moment of weakness with the officer, but when she showed up outside the mansion a month later with a grainy black and white photo Steve knew he had to push Tony away.

He would admit that his actions were demonic in nature, and he wanted to vomit every time his hands came in contact with Tony's body because even though it was accepted back then to abuse your spouse, as everyone turned a blind eye, Steve couldn't stop the uneasy feeling it left him with. The hurt in Tony's eyes the first time he stuck him made him weak in the knees and reminded him of the new term Natalie threw around; Domestic Violence. Tony didn't deserve Steve's insecurities, and he sure as hell didn't deserve the treatment the soldier dished out at him. His illogical thinking pushed him to be harsh with his lover because then maybe Tony would hate him enough to never want to take him back and damn near every time Steve pleaded for forgiveness the billionaire caved and accepted Steve with open arms. This was a never ending, vicious cycle that needed to end.

His phone rang, the sound piercing through the thick atmosphere of his truck, jolting the blonde from his thoughts. Fumbling with the piece of Stark technology, Steve groaned as the familiar number of SHIELD's home base illuminated itself on the touch screen. Looking to the clock on his dashboard, the captain groaned at the time knowing he was already more than an hour late. "Director Fury, I—"

"Save it Rogers, I need you to suit up. Report back to base, the Avengers are needed." Leaving no room for an argument, Steve frowned as the line was suddenly disconnected. Growling to himself, frustrated beyond belief, Steve tossed his phone into his bag that sat idly in the passenger's seat. Natalie would have to forgive him later; Steve had something he had to deal with at the current moment. Already dreading the later hours of the evening and the following day, Steve pulled out of his parking space and headed towards base.

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

Clint stood over Tony's shoulder, a hard look plastered over his face at the man's complete stubbornness. Arms crossed firmly over his chest, the blonde rocked back onto his foot to settle his weight over his left hip and fixed the engineer with a firm glare. Drumming his fingers impatiently along his bicep, Clint waited for Tony to acknowledge his concerns and head back home to rest. "I'll be fine—"

"God damn-it, Stark!" Tony flinched at the sudden outburst but refused to turn and look at the archer. "You can barely move, how do you expect to pilot the MARK suit?"

"He's right, Tony." Bruce lamented, agreeing fully with the archer that Tony should still be confined to bed rest. The brunette should consider himself lucky that Bruce even allowed him to busy his hands in his lab, but this was where the doctor found him putting his foot down. Not only was it reckless on Tony's part, but it was also going to create a liability with the team if Tony suddenly found himself incapable in the heat of battle. "Go home, I'm sure the three of us can handle this."

"You mean the five of us." Everyone's head snapped over to Steve who had walked in, dressed for the occasion in his battle ware.

"Tony's injured, he can't fight." Natasha offered up from her silent position in her chair.

"I'll be fine—"

"He says he's fine, he's fine. Stop babying him, we have to go. I'll brief everyone on the way." Turning to march back out of the room, Steve missed the teams jaws hit the flooring and just pushed his way down the halls and down a few flights of stairs towards the flight deck where the new SHIELD issued Avengers jet was awaiting the remainder of the team. Clint growled loudly and slammed his fist down on the desk.

"You are not going, Tony, and that's final!" Ignoring the startled look that appeared over the man's face, Clint rolled his chair back and perched himself on the engineer's lap, thighs bracing the edge of thin waist. "Do you like being hurt all the time?" Tony shook his head and refused to look up into Clint's concerned blues eyes that reminded him so much of Steve's. "Well then you must enjoy making the rest of us suffer, because we care about you Tony. Please, if not for yourself but for us, go home and rest. I promise you can come with us on the next mission." Leaning forward to rest his forehead on the man's shoulder, Clint slowly drew a breath in trying not to get overly worked up.

"It'll be okay and if I feel like I can't hold my own I'll duck out and offer intell from the jet." Patting the archer on the back knowing where the sudden surge of protectiveness was originating from, Tony waited for Clint to slowly extract himself so he could stand and follow his team out to the loading dock. Briefcase in hand, Tony locked his jaw and was thankful for the reassuring hand Clint slipped into his own as they boarded the jet. "I'll be okay," he reassured the blonde before taking a seat in one of the rear seats and buckling in while Clint slowly made his way towards the pilots seat.

He cast a quick glance at the brunette, silently reassuring himself that this wasn't going to be a disaster, and sunk into his seat heavily. Huffing out a long breath his hands deftly sought out the controls to work his way through his pre-flight battery of tests. Contrary to popular belief, SHIELD only learned of his skill with a bow and arrow and crazy aiming capabilities after recruiting him from the Air Force for his natural flying dexterity. Slipping his headphones on over his ears and adjusting the mic to rest two inches away from his mouth, he spoke briefly with the air traffic controllers back at the base and awaited for the clearance to lift them up into the sky.

To say there was zero tension in the cockpit of the large jet would be an understatement because there was not only the one elephant but the whole fucking zoo hanging around the team roaring and making all sorts of inappropriate noises that distracted each member from focusing on their newest mission. Steve tightly held the StarkTablet in his hands and starred down at the words floating across the screen, desperately trying to ignore the nagging feeling in the back of his mind that something wasn't right and they had no business venturing into the northern parts of Greenland to seek out a possible alien threat that a group of analysts found well over a few weeks ago. The team was divided against him because of the recent turn of events with his and Tony's relationship ending the way it did, and for the most part he couldn't blame them and in the same respect he had to argue that even though things were taken a little too far they still should respect him enough to get them all home in one piece.

"Thunderbird you are clear for Heaven's flight." A familiar voice chirped in Clint's ears and his hands flicked over a series of switches before he pulled down on a lever to start the forward motion of the jet. Once in the air, Clint leaned back and adjusted the headset over his ears and threw Tony a concerned look before stabilizing them at their current altitude and activating the autopilot system that was connected to JARVIS's server back in New York. Choosing to keep his free hands busy, by making himself look unavailable, the pilot was pleased when his captain turned away from him to address the others.

"The information is in your tablets, but according to SHIELD intell an unidentified life force touched down in the northern hemisphere of Greenland. Over the last several weeks people have turned up missing, and a few of those people have been found but they… well, I'm not sure how to classify this but—"Steve rubbed the back of his neck with one of his large hands unsure how to scientifically describe what was happening. Thankfully Tony and Bruce seemed to be reading ahead in their respective tablets and comparing notes in the back of the class and completely ignoring their team leader. Even Natasha was turned in her seat to listen in on their high tech conversation about human mutation. Steve clenched his jaw tightly, a little irritated that they decided to stop list listening to him.

"—the cell samples have been genetically mutated, that's for sure." Tony commented lowly as his fingers skillfully skipped across the surface of his tablet before bringing up the holograms and grabbing at an atom replication wireframe and holding it in his palm. "Got to be honest here Doc, this is more your area of expertise; I do tech, you do biology."

Bruce nodded to himself and reaches out to grab the ends of a table and enlarged the picture so he and Tony could both properly read it from in their seats. "If I'm reading this correctly, the ground is giving off low levels of Gamma radiation too."

"Are we going to need HAZMAT gear for this?" Natasha inquired as she set her tablet on the seat next to her and turned fully to watch over the back of her seat. "If so, we should suit up before we land and work with the locals to set up a decontamination center to treat the civilians who have been exposed."

"I think Bruce needs a few friends, Nat." Clint commented offhandedly from the pilot's seat. His eyes lit up with mirth underneath his black visors. "I think we should get one of each color and add them to the team; Power Rangers, just Hulk style."

Natasha deadpanned and shook her head while Tony bit into his bottom lip to suppress a few chuckles. Everyone seemed to relax at the sound of him laughing and Clint was internally masturbating his ego for finally getting Tony to loosen up, especially around Steve. "That's just what the world needs, another Hulk, let alone a team of them."

"Yeah, but the original will always have an honorary spot on the Avengers team." Tony playfully nudged Bruce with his elbow and returned his eyes back to his holograms. "I'm no expert, but I don't think these levels would be detrimental to a person with short term exposure. We're definantly going to need an environmental group to come in and work clean-up, but when don't we need them?"

"I agree, Tony, we shouldn't need the HAZMAT gear but just to be safe I'm going to upload an algorithm to JARVIS and have him monitor the levels in the ground. If my calculations are correct, the radiation should have spread to cover the entire land mass by the time we land so we're just going to have to be cautious. Each of your Stark-Watches we gave you a few weeks ago to monitor air toxicity, so with a few modifications to them before we land they will also alert you to areas of high exposure risks." Natasha nodded and slipped her watch off her wrist before handing it over to the good doctor.

Steve who was still fuming held his palm out and waited for their pilot to wrestle his off and drop it into his awaiting palm alongside his own. With everyone's watches, Bruce excused himself and moved towards the back of their newly updated Thunderbird to begin working. If he was worried about Hulking out on accident his composure didn't reflect any of his worries which put the rest of the team at ease. "What should the rest of us be doing, Cap?" Tony asked with a distant voice, clipped and professional. His eyes never lifted from his readings on the file and his hands never stopped moving but Steve knew he was waiting for an answer even if he wasn't looking at him.

It took a long time for Steve to learn and understand the genius, and now that he was keyed in to his mannerisms the fact that he could hardly look at him without having the corners of his mouth drop unsettled the soldier. It was his fault for that pain he caused his lover, and now he had to deal with the repercussions and look forward to a future with Natalie, Jake, her baby daddy, and the little one on the way. Ignoring his personal phone buzzing in his pocket again for what felt like the tenth time that hour, Steve crossed his arms and sighed. "We should focus on recon and see if we can find ground zero or any evidence as to what we're dealing with. If it's just a space rock like the techs back at headquarters thinks, I'd like to obtain proof that there isn't anything else to worry about. While Dr. Banner and Stark remain at the safe house monitoring the radiation levels I'd like the three of us to get out and see what we can find."

Natasha nodded, already knowing that her people skills were going to be needed because if they entrusted that detail to her blonde counterpart the whole mission could go belly up in a matchbox douse with gasoline. It'd be better to wash their mouths out with buckshot before they land to save everyone the hassle of dealing with Clint and lack of people skills. There was a reason he was the resident pilot and sniper; he didn't have to deal with people, the lucky bastard. From her turn position she could easily see the smirk on the archers face because he was going to be doing what he loved best, getting up in high places and just using his eyes. Another good thing about this set up was that Steve wasn't going to be alone with Tony and from everyone's collective silence on the plan, they all agreed that it was for the best too.

Landing sooner than he thought possible, Steve glanced at Clint who was busy flipping switches and turning knobs to power down the SHIELD issued jet. While their pilot seemed smug about getting them there faster than deemed necessary, Steve found himself smirking at the man's arrogance; the self assurance was a slight turn on for him. Glancing back to Tony who was moving to join Bruce, he felt his heart throb slightly before shaking it off and looking at the remaining two Avengers in the cockpit. "Cap, if you go out there dressed like that, and if _you_ go out dressed like that, were going to blow our cover and _you're_ going to freeze to death." She tapped her foot impatiently on the floor, waiting for the boys to catch on to her newly changed wardrobe. When did she change?

Steve was the first to nod and moved to switch into the winter gear SHIELD provided while Clint fixed his jaw in an irritated manner. "You know I don't shoot my bow as well when I have sleeves on, it messes with my aim and precision."

"You'll just have to use a long range weapon this time, birdbrain. Also, I don't think you'd want to catch hypothermia up in a tree." The blonde nodded and moved to quickly change into something much warmer and to fetch his alternative weapon with a loud grumble under his breath. Moving into the back where the science nerds were talking higher than high-level math, Clint silently started to change out of his traditional uniform and into the warmer TDU's, multiple layers of clothing, and the cold weather jackets. Securing the headband over his ears, effectively hiding the communicator and slipping his long fingers into a pair of snug black gloves, he clapped Tony lightly on the shoulder.

"If he starts bugging you, tell me and I'll make it look like an accident." Allowing his hand to linger on Tony's shoulder longer than appropriately necessary, Clint turned hard eyes on Bruce to silently communicate that he was in charge of keeping Tony safe from Steve should something happen while they were out in the field. It was unnecessary, as Clint had doubts that Bruce would allow anything to hurt his friend but it was still a nice reassurance to himself that he wasn't going to lose another teammate on a mission. Slipping his watch back on, Clint smiled at the two before disappearing out into the cold and securing the strap for his weapon over his shoulder.

"You know, I honestly wouldn't put it past him to try and put a bullet through Steve's head on this mission, Tony." Bruce commented offhandedly. His mind was still focused on the math on the papers in front of him and trying to figure out why their x-variable wasn't fitting to his predictions like it was supposed to until Tony took his pen and reworked a simple miscalculation a few steps back which produced the correct answer on the sheet.

"I really hope he doesn't," he replied while circling the answer and inputting it into the program he had set up with JARVIS. "Steve is still as much of a part of this team whether—"

"—we know that Tony, but what he did to you is unforgivable." The engineer nodded while absently rubbing at his side where the dark bruising had begun to yellow. "Just promise us that you won't let him bully you around anymore."

"You guys act like I'm the only victim in this situation. I mean I've lashed out at him a few times before when our arguments did escalate, and yeah I hit him a few times too, but—"

"You're making excuses again. Steve was the primary physical aggressor in the situation, he hit you Tony! None of us had the perfect parents growing up, but what Howard did to your mom is just as inexcusable as what Steve is doing. Just because he's not drunk doesn't make it any different, the only difference is that he's thinking with a clear head." Busy scribbling out more numbers across the sheet in his messy scrawl, Bruce missed the flash of anguish that cracked across his teammates face. When the engineer didn't say anything for the longest time, the radiation specialist slowly lifted his eyes to see Tony internally fighting with himself on Bruce's words. "You're not alone anymore, Tony. We'll be there to catch you from now on."

Smiling slowly, he slowly looked Bruce in the eye before turning back to their work and whispering a small "thank you".

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

A/N I know, I'm a terrible person for making you all wait so long for this update but work is a bitch, life kind is sucking all my energy away, and school is the only time I actually get some alone time so… I know updates won't be as frequent, but I promise you all that I'll do my best to update when I can. Huge shout out to everyone who has reviewed—I tried responding to them as they came in, but I have a feeling I missed a ton so even if I didn't reply to your review it was greatly appreciated—and another shout out to everyone who added this to their alert subscriptions. You all rock and it makes me smile every day to see that this is still tracking well even with me being a terrible author and unable to update like I want.


	5. Chapter 5

I Wrote Your Name

Chapter 5: Useless, Unwarranted Feelings

"_I wrote your name in the sand, but the ocean washed it away_

_I wrote your name in the clouds, but the wind blew it away_

_I wrote your name in my heart, where forever it will stay"_

Clint was doing his best to not cry out in agony from the multiple wounds littered across his body. For such a simple reconnaissance mission this turned into a quick blood bath with the youngest member sustaining the brunt of the hurt. Natasha was still missing in action, none of them had heard a static crackle from her after Clint's ear shattering scream resonated through their communication system, and Steve was out on the front lines with the Hulk fighting off the multiple genetically mutated humans and wilderness animals that took to attacking the Avengers almost as soon as their foot team was off the jet. "Clint, come on, you got to stay with me buddy. Here, hold this right here and don't let go. Can you do that?" Moving the calloused hands to the once white towel pressing firmly into his abdomen, Tony waited until he was satisfied of the pressure before moving to remove the archer's belt.

"You could at least take me to dinner first." His voice was raspy, barely above a whisper, and his teeth gnashed tightly together to keep himself from crying out in pain. Lightly laughing as Tony cracked a small smile Clint felt his belt loosen around his waist and the lead slip through the loops in a few harsh tugs. He knew what Tony was going to do and as much as he wished he wouldn't he sinks his teeth into his bottom lip in time for his teammate to loop the belt around the bite in his thigh. A deep breath in, he screams once the tension pulls on his muscle, slowing the blood flow from his femoral artery. "Fucking hell!"

Securing the makeshift tourniquet around the blonde's leg, Tony turned quickly to grab a few blankets from the counter and started to wrap the archer up. The engineer's bruised side screamed in agony from the twisting motion in his thoracic cavity. Clint's skin was ice cold, mostly due to the weather in combination with the blood loss, but across his forehead a bright red color dominated his features. There was no doubt he had an infection. They needed to get Clint to the medical team waiting for them at the Greenland base just a short flight in the south-west direction or risk losing their archer to the unknown virus eating his insides. _"Medical ETA is ten-minutes."_ Thankful for the hiss of static across their earpieces, Tony proceeded to respond.

"We've got one down. Barton's sustained a laceration-bite wound to his left upper thigh and has a penetration wound in his upper right quadrant of his abdomen. There's substantial blood loss and his respiratory and pulse is rapidly declining." Clint's glassy eyes starred up at Tony's worried face with a look of pained recognition. Reaching out his palm connected lovingly with the side of Tony's face, spearing blood across his cheek.

"Coulson," he whimpered. "I'm sorry, sir." Glassy blue eyes starred up in fear.

"No, you stay with me Barton!" Tony growled as one of his hands reached to hold Clint's hand that was holding his cheek while the other slammed down atop Clint's other pale hand on his abdomen. The marksman grunted in pain, eyes rolling in the back of his head. He was fighting to stay conscious but the heavy sleepy feeling weighted him down, grounding him to the floor and everything felt sluggish. "Cap, you guys need to pull back and get out of there!" Looking down at the angry puss leaking from Clint's femoral wound Tony immediately feared the worse. His lower leg was twisted in an unnatural way, undoubtedly broken under the twisted skin and muscle from his twenty foot fall out of the pine tree he made his snipers nest in. "Steve, answer me!"

"_I'm a little busy, Tony!"_

Growling because of how useless he felt, unable to help his friend and unable to go out and fight, he threaded his fingers with Clint's hand and brought the bloodied knuckles around to place a soft kiss to. Clint was hallucinating and currently thought Tony was his dead lover, their late SHIELD liaison known as Special Agent Phil Coulson, and was muttering all the apologies he never go to say, muttering all the _I love you's _that were forgotten over the last few years in the pain of his loss, and if Tony could put Clint at ease by playing along he would. Clint deserved a happy ending, deserved to be happy—they all did—but someone out there made it their personal mission for each Avenger to suffer.

Thor was drug back to his duties on Asguard while his father was in bed ill with some sort of injury, Bruce was still healing from the loss of his science girlfriend Betty as she refused to speak to him anymore, Clint lost his husband of ten years to a deranged God with daddy issues, and Natasha… The woman had the emotional capacity of a shoe, but the woman had an uncanny affiliation with their archer and when he was hurting she was also hurting. Pepper cheated on him and left and the rest was history between himself and the super soldier. Their lives were messed up, forcing them to face the seriousness of everything that none of them wanted to face. It wasn't fair, they all had their demons and the world just liked to keep throwing more and more at them. It was only a matter of time until they all broke.

"Mr. Stark, I need you to move back." A team of three medics rushed into the hanger of the jet, pulling a long board and toting multiple field bags of medical supplies to stabilize their agent before transporting him back to the chopper where the pilot had the bird elevated with a drop rope waiting to haul them back up. Stumbling back, wincing in pain as he twisted again, Tony blearily watched as they worked to stabilize Clint. "I need leads on him; he's unresponsive times-three."

A portable monitor was produced out of nowhere. One of the younger medics popped open one of the panels and plugged in a chord that spider-webbed out into little probes where she quickly attached a few little sticky pads to the end and stuck them to the archers now exposed chest. Turning the monitor on, Tony's mind was reeling with multiple ways to improve the Stone Age piece of equipment, they watched the spikes and drops on the monitor that decoded the marksman's heartbeat.

"BP is 76 over 28, he's hypovolemic, and we need to get him into surgery." The dark haired medic spouted off as he palpated the archer's body and listed to his vitals. "Respirations are at 28. Let's get a BVM on him with the O2 lead set on 3LPM. I want to regulate his respiratory system. There's a possibility for a tension pneumothorax." The third medic stuck a needle into his arm and moved to bring their long board over while the other two checked the C-collar Tony wrapped around his partners neck before he moved him into the warmth of the jet from his fall. The team log rolled him from the ked-board onto their board and strapped him down. Just as fast as the team infiltrated the back of their jet they were gone and out moving Clint systematically up into their chopper.

Tony slipped back into his armor and bolted off to the battle area where Steve and the Hulk were slowly losing the battle against the multiple infected civilians. Their no kill policy had long ago been tossed out the window when their radiation specialist had determined earlier that the prolong exposure, coupled with the virus, fried their insides and the anomalies attacking were nothing more but a soulless body attacking on its natural instinct to feed. Without further experimentation and data collection it was tough to say, but Tony's mind immediately went to an episode of The Walking Dead because this was almost too zombie like for him. Firing off multiple repulsor blasts at their enemy, he swooped down in time to pull their Captain up and out of the mess of clawing fingers and bared teeth. With Bruce so worked up as he was, there was little Tony could do for him, but for now he had to get Steve to a safe area and figure out their next plan of attack to find their missing teammate and get Bruce out of that mess as well as figure out what the hell happened.

"Base this is Captain Rogers; I need all points of entry and exit sealed off. No one comes in or out of Greenland until we get this contained, we cannot risk an infection spread to other nations." Steve slumped heavily in Tony's arms. Normally Tony couldn't move the blonde even if he wanted to but with the added technological muscle of the suit he could manhandle Steve with the best of them. Securing his arms tighter around the soldier's chest, making sure he wasn't going to slip and fall, Tony landed them by the jet to see that a few stragglers' from the main group followed the trail of Clint's blood back to their Thunderbird. Taking a few headshots of the enemies licking at the floor, tasting their archers blood on their tongues, Tony winced as their bodies dropped in a dead heap in the back.

"Do you know how to pilot this thing?" Tony asked once they were situated in the cockpit. Steve's hands hovered over the controls, years advanced from his memory of the aircrafts they had back in the early 1900's, and he hesitated to touch anything in fear of accidently setting something off in the high-tech piece of equipment. "Steve—"

"Shut up, Tony!" He snapped, fist slamming down on the armrest. The fiberglass shattered upon impact with Steve's fist flowing through to land on the base of the chair. "Just give me a second to figure this out." If Steve was a swearing person, he would be cussing up a storm.

Tony flinched and recoiled back out of learned experience with Steve's explosive temper. Even protected in his MARK suit, Tony knew Steve could still hurt him from within his protective shell. Staggering back until he dropped into one of the seats in the back, Tony landed heavily and just watched Steve attempt to work out how to get such a large aircraft into the air. About to suggest having JARVIS pilot them back to base a snarl caught his attention before a pair of acidic teeth sunk into the metal of his armor. Crying out from pure shock the engineer bolted and threw off his attacker into a herd of other mindless civilians licking at the floor where Clint once lay. Swearing to himself he made a body shield to protect his captain behind him when the shatter of glass caught his attention from behind.

Steve swore a fowl word loudly and leaped back to keep away from the reaching claws and chomping teeth. Back to back with Tony, the blonde's hand unconsciously sought out Tony's hand to lace their fingers together to ground him and alert the soldier to his teammate's orientation. Pressing his back further into the hard planes of Tony's armor Steve felt the shift of the mechanics before Tony's arms encircled his body once again and shot off into the sky, blasting a hole through the roof of their jet. Looking down at the hole they created in the Thunderbird Steve lost count at the multiple anomalies piling into the cockpit filling the space where they had previously been. Fighting with the zipper on his winter jacket, Steve drags the small metal accessory down to about his mid-sterna region and reveled at the relief the cool air infiltrating the layers under his jacket to cool his heated skin. That was close…

"We need to head back to base and regroup with a tactical team." Steve stated as he zipped his jacket back up.

"We can't just leave them!" Tony shot back, appalled that Steve was even suggesting leaving Bruce out in the wild to fend for himself against the infected humans and animals while Natasha was still missing. "Steve, we can't—"

"We can and we will!" He retorted matter-of-factly. "Take us back to the base and wait for orders on returning to the field to look for them." The order was indefinite and every fiber of Tony's being argued against it.

As much as Tony wanted to argue, a part of him knew Steve was right that they did need assistance from the extraction teams to find Natasha and get Bruce out in one piece. With one last distant look towards the destruction where Bruce was mauling the beasts and roaring in anger, Tony begrudgingly turned towards the south and flew off towards the base telling himself that Bruce would be okay and Natasha was the toughest son of a bitch he'd ever met. A part of him also wanted to check up on their resident marksman, the man who alerted them all to this devastation in the first place and saved Natasha in time before she'd gotten her head bitten off, to make sure than his best friend wasn't going to die of injuries sustained in the field. Touching down on the snow-fallen tarmac, Tony let Steve storm off towards an awaiting team of troops ready to listen to his every order, no doubt the soldiers wet dream as he always had a flair for dominating everything they did together, while he took an extra moment to extract himself from his suit. Picking up the case he made a bee-line towards the medical ward to check on Clint.

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

Standing on the observation deck, leaning heavily against the railing, Tony watched in horror as the doctors worked as a team to clean out Clint's wounds, set his broken leg which would have the archer laid up for about six months, and diligently work to close up all bite wounds and the puncture wound in his stomach. He was hooked up to a respirator, tube shoved down his throat to artificially inflate his lungs to keep his body oxygenated through the procedure, and multiple other chords stemmed off his hands and chest that hooked into machines that fed out his vitals and pumped his body full of nutrients and medications to clean out his blood stream. Feeling sick himself he turned to land heavily in one of the chairs.

Hands shaking, he curled his fingers into a tight fist hating himself for getting so worked up and even more so for feeling so helpless in this situation. He was waiting for Steve to give the command to re-enter the wilderness to set out and start looking for Natasha and Bruce. A few passing agents had their radios turned up a little too loud and Tony heard that the Hulk had disappeared, meaning that he transformed back into the more vulnerable Bruce and was now fighting the elements as well as an enemy out to feed on him. There was still no word on Natasha, but Tony liked to think that she was smart enough to get onto high ground and protect herself. Growling, because this was all just conjecture, he pushed himself up to his feet and turned to watch the doctors again. He ignored the roll in his stomach and forced himself to watch.

Clint looked so pale against the white sheets. His heart went out for the younger man, hating himself that he had to lie to give the man a moment of peace by pretending to be Coulson to get the younger man to relax. Phil Coulson would know what to do in this situation; he always had a brilliant plan of operation for every situation, and would know how to help Clint the best. The first time Tony heard Phil talking on a cell-phone in private back in Malibu all those years ago, speaking in lovingly hushed tones that only a lover could say to their significant other, he had no idea it was Clint at the time. A few days later he saw Agent-Agent softly kissing a young man with blonde hair, holding him tenderly and bringing him close to nuzzle their foreheads together. It wasn't hard to figure out that this was the man Coulson was talking to on the phone, but it was a little weird to see the very straight-acting agent kiss another man. Tony always swung both ways, he never really saw gender when it came to someone who wasn't going to use and abuse him, but it was still a little different because he always had this image of a beautiful long haired brunette with a plain-Jane body type waiting at the front door with a freshly baked cherry pie waiting for the man at home not a gorgeous young blonde man dressed from head to toe in SHIELD apparel with a hard body and a mischievous glint behind his eyes.

Tony envied them, God did he wish he have what they had. Steve was supposed to be his soldier-in-ratty-fatigues who would ride into town on a humvee and save the stranded civilian from sure death, and he honest to God was at first. Now Steve resembled the shadow around every corner and he hated that the blonde turned out to be exactly just like everyone else he let get close. Bruce and Clint were close to that place that Steve invaded but he could never allow one of them to cross the line that could potentially turn their coveted friendship into something to tainted and so ugly. Hating himself for allowing that to happen with Steve, Tony closed his eyes against the pain that the blonde would be forever gone. Deep down, he blamed himself for it because somehow it was always his fault.

He lost track of time like he usually does. The surgeons and nurses were moving the archer out of the operation room and heading towards the intensive care unit for continual post operational treatment and observation. Silently climbing down from the observation deck Tony numbly followed with an uncertain weight settling over his chest. A doe-eyed nurse placed her hand on his arm, stopping Tony before he could cross into the room to take up a residence at the bedside chair next to Barton's bed. He slowly looked at her, pleading silently to let him pass, and willing her hand to leave him. "Mr. Stark—"

"—I need to—"She shook her head with a sad smile.

"Mr. Stark, Captain Rogers has asked me to look at you while we're here. Agent Barton needs to rest and will be here when we get back." Her hand moved from around his arm to enclose gently around his wrist. Tony tried not to flinch. Leading him off towards an observation room, Tony expected the room to be empty of any other personnel but was thoroughly surprised to see Steve leaning against the wall with a couple of steri-strips along the side of his face, securing the long scratches running from his jaw to his temple. His arms were crossed and his head bowed down. "Take a seat," she motioned for the observation table.

Setting his case on the ground close by to easy access, Tony wearily passed by Steve to ease himself up onto the cool table. The nurse snapped on a pair of blue surgical gloves and turned back to Tony with a softer smile on her young face. Helping Tony out of his shirt, she set it behind him on the stainless steel surface and moved with purpose to check his injured side. She hummed a few times, palpating his tender areas and clucking her tongue in disapproval while glancing over at the super-soldier with the same censorious look. "On a scale of one to ten Mr. Stark, what is your pain level?"

Tony hesitated in answering; fearing that if he was honest then Steve would make him stay back like he should have done initially. The bruises that had started to green were now angry and dark all over again, just as painful as the first day. But it wasn't Steve's fault that he was hurt again, because he was supposed to stay inside the jet with Bruce until the safe house could have been set up. That was before the explosion sent their archer hurtling through the air which prompted the whole debacle that tail-spun their mission out of control. Tony shot off like a bullet out of a chamber and caught Barton just before his body could crash into an awaiting tree trunk. Tony would be picking out wooden splinters for weeks from the metal as well as pine needles from the collision on the snowy ground that had winded him. It was Bruce who brought over the Ked-board to secure the archers battered body and even the small field bag full of gauze and other medical supplies.

The two worked in harmony to carry Clint back to the safety of their jet when they were first attacked. While Tony was safe in his armor his other teammates were exposed and their enemy seemed to pick up on that faster than anything. A fight drove back Tony and a Hulked out Bruce away from an unconscious Clint where a few deranged animals tore their teeth into his skin and pulled before Tony and Bruce could reach his side to intervene. Tony was the reason they were able to escape, grabbing the green material of the spinal-protection device and wrapping his metal arms around the archer's torso and flying off towards the assumed safety of their jet.

"Mr. Stark?" She asked again, this time her voice showing concern for his altered mental state.

Tony shook his head, clearing his thoughts. "A four or five, maybe? Sorry I zoned out there, Amanda." Glancing at her nametag, Tony sighed and noted how she was tossing Steve worried looks. Chancing a glance towards their captain, Tony tilted his head in confusion at the worried look on Steve's fixed face.

Amanda nodded and made some annotations on Tony's chart. Pocketing her pen, she took a step towards the door promising to return with some pain medications. Parting with the stern request to rest, the door closed with an audible click. Tony fumbled with his fingers for a moment, hating the chill that took to his exposed skin from the stagnant air that always hung in the air in every hospital. Turning to grab his shirt from behind him, Tony hissed at the pull of his muscles. Steve was suddenly in his personal space, crowding him and easing his body back forwards with strong steady hands on Tony's slumped shoulders.

Tony released a shaky breath, not daring to say a word incase his voice would shatter the illusion that Steve was suddenly back to his caring self. Breathing through the pain flaring from his fractured ribs, Tony sunk his teeth into his bottom lip to stave a pitiful moan. Those massive hands on his shoulders radiated enough heat to warm his shoulders. With the blonde being so close, Tony swore he could feel the kinetic heated energy wafting off his enhanced body warming his skin and lulling him into a false sense of security. Closing his eyes, he breathed through the pain until it subsided and he could think straight. Steve didn't move.

Chancing a look up, Tony tipped his chin up. Surprised beyond comprehension, his lips catching the blondes in a chaste kiss, they both froze. Wide blue eyes starring wildly into fear blown brown eyes, neither dared to move or break the warm connection between their mouths. A look of recognition crossed Steve's eyes as he sunk into the warmth of Tony's mouth, lips moving like muscle memory across his chapped lips and his tongue swiping across his bottom lip _asking_ for permission. Their eyes slipped shut, surrendering into the warmth of the kiss when their bodies remembered their numb appendages.

Steve's hands moved from Tony's shoulders. One traveled up to cradle his head in his palm while the other moved south to support the brunette at his hip. Moving closer into the parted space between Tony's legs, Steve tugged Tony closer to the edge until their bodies were nearly touching on every plane. Tony's arms carefully came up to wrap cautiously around Steve's neck, brining him down so their height difference wasn't even a factor. Steve was the first to moan when his tongue finally met Tony's, remapping out the inside of his lovers mouth and memorizing all the short cuts and main attraction areas before traveling into the secret areas that always drove the engineer crazy. Tony responded with a soft whimper, body tense and twisting to seek out Steve's own body.

Breaking away for a moment to breathe, Steve's lips caught Tony's once again. Their mouths were sealed tightly, hands searching for purchase on the others body, gently roaming over the all too familiar planes of muscle and expanse of skin. Tony hissed when Steve's hand brushed over his side but pushed aside his pain in favor of melting into Steve's body where the pain didn't seem so unbearable. Pulling away, Steve starred down with an apology behind his eyes. Those cobalt blue eyes zeroed in on the dark bruising, fingers lightly brushing calloused pads across and for a second Tony thought he caught a look of pained recognition cross Steve's face; a gentle reminder that he was the cause for those markings. Claiming Tony's mouth against his own, a softer and gentler kiss than before, Steve's hands followed to come up and curl around the angle of the engineer's jaw.

"Steve," he gasped. His own dexterous hands came up, nimble fingers lightly coiling around the soldier's wrists, to cautiously hold Steve closer in a silent prayer that this wasn't a dream. It felt so good to have Steve's kisses again, to have the soldier touch him with such reverence that it made the billionaire slowly break apart on the inside. Tony's lips languidly moved with Steve's, a half a second behind as his nerves were still reveling in the feel of his lovers soft touch when suddenly the soldier bolted back with enough force to shake the wall he collided with.

Tony's hand came up to his mouth like he had been burned and Steve looked like he was about to expel acid from his mouth. The door opened and Amanda walked in with a small Dixie cup of water and an even small cup with two white pills inside. She glanced awkwardly between the two, unsure of what just happened. Steve's eyes hardened and he was out the door in a flourish leaving the confused nurse and the emotionally damaged Tony behind. "Mr. Stark?"

Tony took the offered tablets. Grabbing his shirt off the table he moved out of the room just as fast, fearing that if he stayed there anymore that the room would suck out all the oxygen from his body. Quickly finding the chair in Clint's room, he curled his legs up to his chest and dropped his forehead to his knees. Arms securing around his shins, he took a deep breath thankful for the medication coursing through his body. "Clint, you have to wake up. I need you buddy."

A-V-E-N-G-E-R-S

A/N it's just a week and a half late, but I did promise an update! See, I'm not such a terrible person! Or, I don't like to think I am…but I guess I am because I'm really messing with everyone now. Poor Tony! Even I felt bad for him in this one. Just to let everyone know, the remainder of the story is NOT going to be taking place in Greenland, but the next few chapters will be based around the mission from hell there. I mean, Natasha is still missing and Bruce is out in the cold. We gotta save them and neutralize the enemy! Thanks to everyone who reviewed and to everyone who is adding this to their favorite's list as well as their alert lists. You guys all make my days with those alerts in my inbox.

11-11-12 hey guys, just a minor footnote here! I did go back and I fixed a lot of spelling and grammatical errors. Sorry for those, I don't have a beta, so please bear with me. Also, I did add a few more paragraphs on the bitter-sweet moment between Tony and Steve as per request from a few of you. Hope that eases everyone over for a while! Again, thanks to everyone who's reviewed!


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